LOLBugged

[lolmac]

It duznt git to Jack da same way.
icanhastofu.com
Episode:   Death Knell, Season 7           Screen Capture from:  rda_daily

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Land Mimes, Part 1

[thothmes.livejournal.com]

It all started with a trip to the mall. When Jack realized that Teal'c was spending his off duty time in BDUs because he lacked anything else to wear, he decided that this had to change, and he gathered up Teal'c and a fruitlessly protesting Daniel, and took them both off to the mall. He'd rather imagined a quick trip through The Gap and Dick's Sporting Goods, followed by a run through Sears to get socks and underwear, but that's not the way it went down. Teal'c did not see the point of a selection of uniform jerseys, and with the exception of a few t-shirts in lurid yellows and oranges from The Gap, he proved to be surprisingly Gap-resistant.

“These blue jeans do not have sufficient room for a person of my size, O'Neill” he stated with disgust.

He did not refer to his height.

Instead, Teal'c spotted an outfitters a few doors down that caught his eye. This was when Jack realized that he had made a terrible, terrible mistake in making this an all male expedition, instead of a team outing. Jack knew that he himself was slightly fashion impaired. Sara had drummed that into him through frequent repetition. He preferred to think of it as preferring the classics, with room to move in comfort. Sara had called it “drawn to the fugly and baggy.” Be that as it may, his running battle with Sara over his clothing had left him with two things: an appreciation for the moderating effect of women on male fashion, and a sympathy for Teal'c's desire to make his own fashion choices. Egged on by Daniel, whom Jack suspected of having more of an interest in the cross-cultural implications of Teal'c's clothing choices, and less of an interest in ensuring that the big guy didn't end up looking funny, Teal picked out a truly frightening series of outfits, with plenty of shiny, neon-colored Hawaiian shirts, and even a cowboy outfit, suitable only for someone who had never as much as touched a horse or cattle, and a few more that screamed “PIMP!” to Jack.

They had just emerged from that store and were heading down towards Sears at the other end of the mall, loaded down with Teal'c's purchases, with Jack a few steps behind where Teal'c and Daniel were walking so they could not see his grimace as he thought about what Carter would have to say when she saw Teal'c in all his lurid glory, when they walked headlong into the clutches of a mime. He was a tall guy, about Jack's size and build, dressed in hi-top sneakers and denim overalls over a bare chest, with a long, shaggy hair of a medium-dark brown, and the traditional white face, and some white gloves. He was eager, energetic, and athletic, and a very, very bad mime. The wind he walked into came from all the directions of the compass. His invisible wall had a wildly undulating surface. He walked in place at a rate of one full step forward for every five steps, and when he hauled in an invisible rope, it seemed like the rope was not a line, but a sine function. It was bad. Harmless, but bad. Jack and Daniel were amused. Teal'c was spooked. Why the doughty warrior with nearly 75 years of battle experience, leader of a vast Jaffa army, experienced with the cultures of many worlds should be deeply troubled by something so simple as a mime, they were unable to get him to explain.

“It is simply not right!” was all he would say.

Re: Land Mimes, Part 1

[lolmac]

Not right indeed!!

Re: Land Mimes, Part 1

[zeilfanaat.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, that's great.
I do wonder if, when he saw the mime, Jack did not have a moment where he thought he was looking in the mirror... or having a moment of deja-vu... *grin*

Re: Land Mimes, Part 1

[thothmes.livejournal.com]

He did. Except for the hair. He shudders visibly. He would never have hair like that. It's against regulations!