Jack: I know it's not great Carter, but it's food. Eat up!
Daniel: Oh, is that what it is?
Sam: Sir, do I have to?
Jack: Being girly, Carter?
Sam: No, sir. [reluctantly sticks two fingers in the bowl, hastily shoves a slimy morsel in her mouth, gags, and moves swiftly behind a stalagmite to rid herself of what she cannot swallow] Oh my god, sir! How do you do it?
Daniel: [sneezes] I think being deprived of my antihistamines helps. I can't taste a thing.
Jack: [shrugs] I've had worse.
Sam: When?!!!
Jack: [stare-of-you-don't-want-to-know] Classified. Don't chew. Small bites, and swallow fast.
Daniel: Teal'c???...
[Teal'c is helping himself to a third heaping, weeping, streaming bowlful. He looks over at his team mates who are openmouthed and frozen in place with disbelieving astonishment.]
Jack: Way to go Junior! Neutralizing the taste and texture is he?
Teal'c: It does not.
[a stunned silence]
Daniel: You... like this?
Teal'c: [with a large and slimy mouthful tucked in one cheek] It is reminiscent of my mother's porridge.
Jack: And I thought mom's lima bean and spinach and tomato casserole was bad!
Daniel: [muttering] No wonder the Jaffa are so aggressive.
Jack: [pats Teal'c semi-consolingly on the back] Helps build strong bodies 12 ways!
Carter: [despite her vast brainpower she's having trouble getting her head around this] So you missed this?
Teal'c: I did not. She was an excellent mother. She was not a good cook. I miss the opportunity to honor her by consuming her cuisine honorably.
I tried to find the Zits comic on their site so I could link to it in all its comedic glory, but alas none of my keywords lead to a successful search.
Jeremy and his friend Pierce are looking at the trays of food in the cafeteria.
Jeremy: I think I'll try the fried rat brains.
Pierce: Steamed leeches please.
View from the rear of the boys, showing the Supremely Unamused Lunch Lady, hairnet and all, clutching her spoon.
Jeremy: [as they head off, trays in hand] We remain comedically ahead of our time.
Pierce: [eyeing his tray with trepidation] Wait -- I think I got what I ordered!
:)
Apologies to lunch ladies everywhere who have to make do with bone-trimmed budgets, stringent guidelines, and then deal with snotty kids. Apologies to Scott and Borgman for not showing the full glory of the illustration to go with the writing. It deserves to be seen as a whole!
\o/ Yay! \o/ I make obeisance to your superior tracking skills, although in my defense I was working off of 2 1/2 hours of sleep snatched in 2 chunks (The intersection of Stay-Up-Late-Monster, Loud-Early-Morning-Whirlwind, and Early-Bird-Plumber).
On the upside, we now have a working toilet downstairs and the pipe in the mudroom that burst has been re-plumbed. On the downside, a little foggy brained here, and we owe The Whirlwind a groveling apology. Seems she didn't flush Substance or Substances Unknown. Her sister has rather sheepishly admitted that she might have not noticed that there were already Q-tips in the wastebasket she emptied into that toilet when she was ill last week. The plumber was puzzled. It flushed... sorta, but he couldn't find anything with his snake. It came on suddenly. It waxed and waned. When he found the cause, it all made sense. The Q-tips were snagging passing TP, and causing clogs, which would, over time resolve. The snake brushed right past the Q-tips and didn't find anything substantial to shove against. All those things about stream flow I learned in Geology lab taking place chez-moi.
Anyway, I'm glad that the hard work and humor of the illustrator can be appreciated and credited properly, and sorry for the best excuse to use your Eww! Eww! Ickkk! icon you will have all week.
Yes, well I only mentioned it because it was such a good real-world example of the phenomenon I mentioned in the comment fic I wrote for the "turned on the red lyte" LOL. When something goes wrong, the ADHD kid is always the first one to be blamed. Every now and then the accusers are *gasp!* WRONG.
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Jack & Sam's Mardi Gras feast #Stargate
Re: Jack & Sam's Mardi Gras feast
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Daniel: Oh, is that what it is?
Sam: Sir, do I have to?
Jack: Being girly, Carter?
Sam: No, sir. [reluctantly sticks two fingers in the bowl, hastily shoves a slimy morsel in her mouth, gags, and moves swiftly behind a stalagmite to rid herself of what she cannot swallow] Oh my god, sir! How do you do it?
Daniel: [sneezes] I think being deprived of my antihistamines helps. I can't taste a thing.
Jack: [shrugs] I've had worse.
Sam: When?!!!
Jack: [stare-of-you-don't-want-to-know] Classified. Don't chew. Small bites, and swallow fast.
Daniel: Teal'c???...
[Teal'c is helping himself to a third heaping, weeping, streaming bowlful. He looks over at his team mates who are openmouthed and frozen in place with disbelieving astonishment.]
Jack: Way to go Junior! Neutralizing the taste and texture is he?
Teal'c: It does not.
[a stunned silence]
Daniel: You... like this?
Teal'c: [with a large and slimy mouthful tucked in one cheek] It is reminiscent of my mother's porridge.
Jack: And I thought mom's lima bean and spinach and tomato casserole was bad!
Daniel: [muttering] No wonder the Jaffa are so aggressive.
Jack: [pats Teal'c semi-consolingly on the back] Helps build strong bodies 12 ways!
Carter: [despite her vast brainpower she's having trouble getting her head around this] So you missed this?
Teal'c: I did not. She was an excellent mother. She was not a good cook. I miss the opportunity to honor her by consuming her cuisine honorably.
Jack: You're a good man, Teal'c.
Teal'c: That is my intention.
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Jeremy and his friend Pierce are looking at the trays of food in the cafeteria.
Jeremy: I think I'll try the fried rat brains.
Pierce: Steamed leeches please.
View from the rear of the boys, showing the Supremely Unamused Lunch Lady, hairnet and all, clutching her spoon.
Jeremy: [as they head off, trays in hand] We remain comedically ahead of our time.
Pierce: [eyeing his tray with trepidation] Wait -- I think I got what I ordered!
:)
Apologies to lunch ladies everywhere who have to make do with bone-trimmed budgets, stringent guidelines, and then deal with snotty kids. Apologies to Scott and Borgman for not showing the full glory of the illustration to go with the writing. It deserves to be seen as a whole!
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http://www.thecomicstrips.com/store/add_strip.php?iid=77745
*g*
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On the upside, we now have a working toilet downstairs and the pipe in the mudroom that burst has been re-plumbed. On the downside, a little foggy brained here, and we owe The Whirlwind a groveling apology. Seems she didn't flush Substance or Substances Unknown. Her sister has rather sheepishly admitted that she might have not noticed that there were already Q-tips in the wastebasket she emptied into that toilet when she was ill last week. The plumber was puzzled. It flushed... sorta, but he couldn't find anything with his snake. It came on suddenly. It waxed and waned. When he found the cause, it all made sense. The Q-tips were snagging passing TP, and causing clogs, which would, over time resolve. The snake brushed right past the Q-tips and didn't find anything substantial to shove against. All those things about stream flow I learned in Geology lab taking place chez-moi.
Anyway, I'm glad that the hard work and humor of the illustrator can be appreciated and credited properly, and sorry for the best excuse to use your Eww! Eww! Ickkk! icon you will have all week.
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